A Traveler and his Cat exploring America.

Friday, February 7, 2020

The Science of Bacon

Quartzsite, Arizona

I worked up an appetite looking at all the junk at the flea market.  I rode Gracie on down the boulevard to where I knew some food vendors were set up.  SAUSAGE WORLD.  He had me on the Bacon Wrapped Hot Dog.  The eight panel sign hanging over the window is the menu.  I saw no sausage listed.  That's okay, I was after the hot dog.  Nice friendly guy was running the stand for his wife while she was away.  Evidently it was her enterprise. I ordered my bacon wrapped hot dog and when he slid it to me I noticed something missing. "Where's the bacon?"  
"Oh its underneath the hot dog."
"But I thought it was going to be wrapped around the hot dog."
"We can't do that anymore.  But you get more bacon this way."
And so began the tale of the great bacon wrapped hot dog controversy.

He tells me the health department said he couldn't wrap bacon around his hot dogs. 
"I had to pay a guy $32 to unwrap all the hot dogs."   Don't ask why.  I didn't.
"Now across the highway over there at Tyson Wash they can sell bacon wrapped hot dogs.  But not here."
"Why's that?" I asked.  "Is it some different jurisdiction of health departments over there?"
With a wave of a hand behind him he says they removed a big septic tank out back some time ago and the soil hasn't been tested yet for contaminants.  "That's what I was told."
So what have we learned here?
Bacon wrapped around a hot dog is an attractant for airborne fecal matter.  Placing bacon beneath the hot dog now makes your dog safe to eat.  Floating poop particles wont land on your hot dog with the bacon removed.  Isn't science amazing?
I said he's going to have to change his sign.  Hot Dog on a Bed of Bacon.  "Don't want to get sued for false advertising now do you?"

Just another story about this crazy town of Quartzsite who continually makes it more and more difficult for vendors and store owners which really are the lifeblood of this town.  Each year more and more choose not to come back and I have seen this myself in the number of years I've been coming here.


  1. Dang, it's getting more and more difficult to get some decent food with fecal matter in it! :)


  2. Well we have learned a lot here except whether or not it was good? I like a good chili cheese dog with onions and mustard. I think the vendors there have a lot of obstacles and that is too bad.

  3. Bacon makes everything just a little bit better.

  4. Sorry i have to laugh..but what a sad hot dog!

  5. Well, I'm going to tell this story to all my bacon loving family and hope they cut their intake by half. Seriously, I've seen fights, pouts and the slight of hand taking bacon from another's plate. The best bacon I every had was deep fat fried bacon at the Texas Fair. Too funny! Enjoy your day.


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